Probability Consultant Tee

Some people trust math. You trust vibes.

As a certified Probability Consultant, your expertise lies in explaining why the next spin, hand, card, game, or parlay is absolutely, undeniably due. Lost 12 times in a row? Perfect. That just means the odds are building.

Professional Qualifications:

• Advanced pattern recognition (seeing patterns where none exist)
• Extensive experience saying "there's no way it misses again"
• Master's Degree in Selective Memory
• Minor in Explaining Bad Beats

Remember: Red has hit 8 times in a row. Black is due. The underdog has lost 5 straight. They're due. Your last 17 parlays missed by one leg. You already know. It was due.

About the Piece: [UN]EMPLYD. was built for the ones who opted out. Every piece is designed with a specific feeling in mind — this one's for those who mistake superstition for analytics and somehow still sound convincing. Limited run. Once it's gone, it's gone. 

Sizing:

EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY

Product information: Gildan 5000, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC

Warnings, Hazard: For adults, Made in Nicaragua

Care instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not iron, Do not dryclean